Sunday, August 21, 2011

Our sacrifices only count in the first world

For my oldest two kids the biggest sacrifice is that they will most likely be in college when the new kids come home. They are sad that they won't really get to know them. Nothing we have done compares with the true sacrifice of knowing you have exhausted all hope and must place was your children for adoption. Nothing compares to the lifelong grief a child experiences the loss of their first family. We appreciate that in a tiny way our move across the country has given us a tiny glimpse of what it is to miss all you have known and loved. Yet, we never lost each other. Sigh. All of our other so called sacrifices have shown us we were way to excessive to begin with. So, for this Sunday and all other days, my prayer for my family on the other side of the world is, I hope since we're still waiting that you're still in each other's arms, because for the rest of your lives, there is no other place that your heart will really want to be.

A Waiting House con't

Each time our family has grown has been really special. This time has taken the cake! We began this process after years of begging on the part of the kids. Adopting again was something we also really wanted to do, but we knew we had a cross country move coming up first. Once we were settled enough we were able to begin the paper trail. Our youngest was five. Now our youngest is seven. WOW! Officially we have been waiting for 8 months. Anyone in the adoption work knows there are many months of waiting that go on before being official.
I think the most beautiful aspect this time around has been the sacrifices. The irony is, we moved to a smaller home so we could afford to have a bigger family! How God rewards! Sweet! We love our smaller home. What a revelation. We all have so much more time to have fun, because we divide and conquer and the dear house is clean! Other luxuries we have eliminated: a computer. Yep, I am typing this entire blog on my phone. Perhaps someday I'll send just leave ALL of auto-corrects very annoying changes. When we need a computer we go to the library. We've found it is actually fun because the entire family can play on computers at one rime. Other items in the list are: no dishwasher, disposal, cable tv, home phone, microwave,etc. and one car for one year tenting it vs. Hotels, simpler birthdays, simpler Christmas, almost exclusive thrift store shopping, no A/C until those kids are home, feeding the family on a detailed menu budget, no movies in the theatre, etc.
God has taught us and rewarded us. It wasn't that hot here this summer and we have been fine with fans. We have one plate per person and don't have really miss the dishwasher. Who needs a disposal when you were can feed scraps to your chickens.


We are a WAITING family

When I was about four years old, I had a book I loved called, The Waiting House. At that time I was the youngest in my family. The Waiting House seemed so mysterious. It was about a little kid, his/her parents and grandparents waiting for the arrival of a new baby. The mom was pregnant, but I didn't get that part. In fact I really didn't get any of it. I didn't know any pregnant people at that time. I also didn't know any babies. We lived in a two kid per family area and the families I knew were "complete" by the time I came around. The only baby I knew was some distantcousin who happened to have dimples just like me. It was all very egocentric on my part. Still that book held this special mystery and somehow made me feel sorry for this family because they had waited so long. My mom always seemed so sad when she read it. Now I understand why that I was four and she was sad because we hadn't been a waiting house for a long time. It wasn' t until I was in the 4th grade that my precious, adorable baby brother was born. I don't think a baby or young child has escaped my glance since that cold winter day. I have been blessed to have my own waiting house six glorious times. Adoption has been the hardest type of waiting house. But we are seasoned. THIS time we will continue to LIVE and not obsess. NOT!
When you live in a waiting house you always feel it. It's probably kind of like living in the line at the post office or the doctors office. You can be you, but somehow it's n t your regular you. From the moment you both know it is time to begin again, there is a brief knowing glance that says this is us now, our new theme until they are home...no matter how long that is.

Teens Babysitting: WHAT is the POINT

OK. So you do all the work getting them to be all responsible and everything. You pay for the CPR class, the babysitting class and the lifesaving class. After all, you still have young kids at home. Then your younger friends catch wind of it. They stay out really late. YOUR babysitter that you groomed for yourself thinks that is really cool because they are getting paid by the hour. You get to stay home and read just like you did when you were a first time parent and couldn't afford a babysitter. You get to stay up late just like you did when you were 25, but you aren't. But this time you do it fitfully because you are falling asleep and nervously because you have to worry about intruders and drunk drivers. Your friends don't have to worry about intruders and drunk drivers because they have a very responsible babysitter and they are driving your kid home later, so what could happen. You get to wake up at the crack of dawn because you've been responsible for so many years that that is what you do naturallllllly. I think what you get out of parenting teenage babysitters is that neither you or your teen spent any money and one of you actually made some.

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Do we haaave to????

Oh, the whining and procrastinating that was going on at my house this morning! Gotcha ya'! I bet you thought I was going to turn around after yesterday's post and complain about the kids. Nope. Me! I am complaining about me! The kids and I are doing c25k. I didn't want to. They were ready. I was procrastinating to the point of taking care of my eyebrows first. Ha! So glad to have it done now. Funny thing is, I actually enjoy the program. Oh, I am on my nerves!

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Teenagers are AWESOME!!!

When I had four children four and under, gloomy grouches greeted my darling gaggle with that charming phrase, "Just wait 'til they're teenagers." Thanks. That was really worth hearing. Well, guess what box-store shoppers, that fourth child is almost a teenager. These kids are awesome!! I am so sorry that you and yours didn't get to experience THIS! I have to say, my kids aren't unique...they have lots of fantastic friends. (No, they don't read this blog) There is no reason for life to be otherwise. When I see teenagers who are "like that", they have been told somehow that they are entitled. I do feel teenagers are entitled...entitled to be productive members of society! There is so much they are capable of. By being allowed to perform to the best of their ability people develop real self-esteem. The other kind of teenagers are the sad, miserable ones. Poor kids! All that effort and nothing gained!The irony is that their parents put happiness as a top priority. Go figure.